All posts by L.L. Shelton

About L.L. Shelton

Bonnie is a Jesus Lover, and in light of the fact, loves His wonderful church. She is interested in many things and enjoys sharing her view of some of them on this blog. She is a poet and a singer of songs. She resides in Memphis, Tennessee, where she is a dedicated wife and the mother of seven children- five of whom she educates at home, as the eldest two have graduated homeschool and are pursuing their own interests. In her spare moments she may be found in her home office with a client, as she is a practicing Biblical Counselor and a Life Coach. She welcomes you to print and share her articles and poetry, and to quote freely from them with the understanding that she is to be acknowledged as the author. Mrs. Shelton does NOT OWN the copyright to the majority of the photos and other types of illustration used on this site!

Happy Mother’s Day!

It took me twenty-five years to grow seven children to the point that even the youngest could brush her hair and teeth, tie her shoes, and make a PB&J. Note that I said could- not would.

I’ve been re-living a great deal of the experience recently as I’ve spent the last ten weeks raising nine giant breed puppies for the first ten weeks of what I hope will be their long and lovely lives. And as I’ve been compelled to skip yet another fitness class.

The cloistered lifestyle required for such an assignment is an experience in itself. But add to it the fact that one is not secluded alone or with other like-minded adults as in a convent or a monastery, rather one is not sequestered with adults at all. One is confined with newlings and the very young.

This also is not a confinement such as the voluntary commitment for segregation one might make to an institute of higher learning or to a health and beauty spa. Instead, this is a requirement of the job of full-time at home motherhood. Of course, those dedicated mothers who work outside the home are not going off to vacation every time they leave for the office, and are likely calling home often and running straight back there to labor after finishing up on their secondary jobs.

For the past ten weeks, I have cleaned up more poop and pee than I would have ever thought possible- and of course spit-up and the occasional vomit. I’ve listened to the same soft and some silly songs over and over and over again, because they were enjoyable or calming to the little ones. (This is a technique of torture used on adults in certain situations.)

I’ve spoken in soothing tones countless hours regularly repeating myself as the youngsters behavior clearly indicated that they needed to hear these things over and over and over again. Line upon line, precept upon precept, so to speak. I’ve spoken firmly. And I’ve occasionally spoken too loudly, and in a harsh manner and felt the sting of guilt and shame, as well as a need for confession and repentance. I’ve watched in joyous gratitude as some began to do little things for themselves, and as a few began to obey simple instruction as a result.

I’ve washed the same hair- okay fur- cleaned between the same toes and washed behind the same ears, day after day after day. I’ve carefully looked after each one’s diet and need for medications. I’ve comforted the sick and bound up the injured.

And I sang along with those favored songs again and again, hugged, cuddled, petted, played, pleaded and loved more than I could have imagined possible.

Finally, last evening, after all my tremendous effort, someone arrived to take the first of my small charges to a new home. I was over-joyed! Someone new to love her- hopefully better than I ever could! Someone for her to share with- both a home and her life! I was anxious. Would she remember the things I had taught her? The things she’d learned from others? Would she wisely  apply them? Would she remember my great love for her? Would she call me when needed but would she be able to stand on her own four feet? I was sad. Would she remember me at all? Would she ever be back to visit? I was concerned. Would her new helper truly love her? Forever? Would her new helper give her all and yet refrain from spoiling her?

This morning I woke to tend my brood and counted. One was missing! Oh, Dear! Six, seven, eight… where could she be? Where was she hiding? Is she in danger? In moments, it all came back to me. And tonight someone will arrive to take the first boy…

Happy Mother’s Day simply isn’t fitting. Happy EACH AND EVERY DAY to all of you truly devoted young mothers! May God bless your smallest efforts to train aright the boys and girls who will be our future. Next to Christ and faithful fathers, you and they are certainly our hope.

Copyright 2017.  L.L. Shelton.

On Personality and Character

A healthy person is a whole person. A healthy person is not of a different character depending on his altered circumstance or position.  A healthy person is the same person whether with kings or commoners, whether in want or in plenty, whether being praised or criticized.

A healthy person displays the same self in every room in the house, and whether at home or abroad. His identity and morally sensitive values are clear to him and to others.  A healthy person is of an honest and steady character. He is most often able to be relied upon to behave prudently and tends to inspire confidence.

This is not to say he has a perfect character, it is to say he possesses a stable, socially acceptable character. The healthy person is human and will experience a wide range of emotion. He will make his share of mistakes, commit his sins, however he will generally respond to his mistakes and to his sins by taking ownership of them, and by attempting to correct or atone in a responsible manner wherever possible, no matter his personality or temperament.

Some people are unheahlthy, as they have made their way through life never forming a solid identity of their own. They have failed to develop a cohesive sense of self or a coherent system of belief and values. These people are unpredictable at best. They have great difficulty in making decisions- generally either making them too hastily or tending to avoid decisions altogether. They find it complicated to be consistent from day to day.

These people are usually reacting to the moment, behaving in whatever way the hour appears to dictate. Their behavior tends to inspire or at the least contribute to chaos. To be emotionally out of control is more normal than not for these persons as they are routinely fluctuating between emotional flooding and an emotional void. Many are labeled by the mental health field as clinically neurotic and often as disordered personalities.

Then there are those who form a definite identity of their own, including a system of belief and values, but the identity is for one reason and another a socially or morally unacceptable identity. These people are nearly always on stage- acting- pretending to be whatever the moment requires as they do not wish to make their true identity apparent.

They are often difficult to discern as they are highly manipulative and are usually largely engaged in managing impressions and outcomes, regularly leaving little time for anything else. They are most concerned with managing the thoughts of others and ultimately the behavior of others, especially those closest to them.  It may be rightly perceived as a highly sophisticated form of bullying.

Mental health professionals are easily occupied with clients and patients who have spent too much time in the company of someone of this type. This type is recognized to have a disturbed or disordered personality and is increasingly known by the mental health field as CHARACTER disturbed. These are the essentially psychotic. Once recognized, others do best to distance themselves from these people, immediately if possible.

Surely, it is evident and we must admit that the stream of mental health must grapple with every other brook of study and with all academic disciplines ultimately converge to form a river running straight into the ocean of Theology.

To read more on this topic please see, Character Disturbance by George K. Simon, Jr., Phd, also see, People Of The Lie by M. Scott Peck, MD, and Lies, Lies, Lies by Charles V. Ford, MD.

Copyright 2017.  L.L.  Shelton.

Joy In The Morning

Six full moons
My soul has raged
Astounded at the level
Of my pain
Considered every aspect
Of this loss
Breathing grief
Angry at the cross

Hoping hard
To drown my sorrow
My strange companions
Simply rise tomorrow
Maybe never
Paid a greater price
Made so large
A borrowed sacrifice

Finally
In joy surmise
Find it’s morning
Wake as your surprise
Woman’s loss now recognized
In the eyes of a child
Discover strength
Again beguiled.

Copyright 2017. L.L. Shelton.

Trinity

You are kind,
Beyond all I conceive.
Often I am blind,
Yet you always see.
You keep me occupied
With all that pleases.
When I am weary,
On my knees,
You are there to comfort me.

Copyright 2017. L.L. Shelton.

Things I Leave Behind

A mountain towers over me
I curl into a pebble
Slip into the spring
Get lost along the bottom
Water crystal clear and cool
Seeks to cover me
There I rest.

A storm cloud gathers round me
I blend into the breeze
Slip between the trees
Get lost among the leaves
Raindrops large and fresh
Splatter round about me
There I rest.

A raging sea lies before me
I fold into a violent wave
Slip down to the sandy floor
Get lost between the grains
Silence quiet and still
Beckons me
There I rest.

Copyright 2017. L.L. Shelton.

 

Dissociation

Does winter have to last this long?
Did you really have to ask?
I think that I see flowers waving to me top the hill.
Right here. Right now.
It’s a game I learned to play while I was. bound.
Hands tied, face down, I basked
In the glow of sunshine spilling ‘ore the window sill.
Right here. Right now.
I sing songs, shivering, and sad while I am still.
I say see the jaunty laughing daffodils.
Right here. Right now.

Copyright 2017. L.L. Shelton.

 

Rahab Dear Rahab

Rahab Dear Rahab!
Your Story- joy brings!
Thrilling!
Inspiring my soul to sing!

Beautifully illustrating
God’s power to bring
Those most low among us
To be leaders and kings.

Once harlot- now His!
Once Scarlett with sin,
Now white like the snow-
With soul fully cleansed!

You hid the spies
Of God’s chosen race;
God indeed freed you
And death you escaped.

Those you loved rescued
And because you told them,
Surely some realized
They owed all to Him.

How precious this perfect
Picture of Grace!
He chose and you sought Him;
He granted great faith.

Through all revealed to you
His Perfect Way,
He taught you to love
To trust and obey.

One spy was named Salmon,
To him you were wed,
Son, Boaz, came forth
From your wedding bed.

Boaz loved Ruth,
To her he was lead,
In Godly union
Brought forth Obed.

Obed fathered Jesse,
Who fathered a king.
Through David, Bathsheba,
Eternity rings!

We listen enraptured.
Good tidings! Great things!
Jesus Christ, Lord and Savior!
The Once-Always King!

Copyright 1992. L.L. Shelton.

The Battle Won

There is a mighty warrior;
Dark and fearsome is that one.
There is another Soldier;
Bright and shining as the sun.
One is just beginning-
The other all but done.
You must take heart Christian!
The battle has been won!
You have found forgiveness-
Go forward with The Son.

Copyright 1993. L.L. Shelton.

Priorities

I prefer the sound of children laughing to unsoiled and shiny floor.

I prefer an open entry to an ever sealed-tight door.

I prefer those open hearts who share their thoughts with me to sitting down with silence- listening to empty.

I prefer to be alone but only moments at a time, then I converse with God- still not alone I find.

Often it seems hectic but in time I realize
there is an order to my life- people first and things behind.

Copyright  1993.  L.L. Shelton.

I Surrender

I would give my last wish
To see into your eyes
I would give this heart beat
To know what’s on your mind
I would give my best dream
To wake as your surprise
I would give up summer
To be wrapped in your sunrise
I would give all I’ve brought
To the table watch it lie
I would hear you say to me
To burn it we’ll get by
I would sing my last song
To sleep safely at your feet
I would give all I’ve fought
To recall that it is sweet
And I would give my last kiss
To remember it has value
And I know I would be grateful
To have you cultivate the fallow
And I know I’d be grateful
I’d be grateful.

Copyright  2017.  L.L. Shelton.