Babylon is fallen, is fallen, is fallen!
Lunatics are calling, are calling, are calling,
Demons are screaming, are screaming, are screaming,
Their world is careening, careening, careening,
The wicked are wailing, are wailing, are wailing,
Nature is railing, is railing, is railing,
Earth’s systems are failing, are failing, are failing,
Evil’s impaling, impaling, impaling!
Now His furious focus,
No more hope for the hopeless!
Copyright 2024. L. L. Shelton.
God’s Word Tells Us:
1. It is something that we must strive to keep out of any ecclesia- out of any gathering of two or more in the name of Christ Jesus.
2. It is something God hates.
3. It is something that will bring us pain.
4. It is something that brings pain and illness to those we claim to love.
5. It is something that wills to kill us.
6. It can be blatant or subtle.
7. It loves the dark.
8. It hates the light.
9. It loves a lie.
10. It hates the truth.
11. It is self-seeking.
12. It puts self over others.
13. Its source is pride.
14. It is something that will not remain hidden indefinitely.
15. It is something that every man knows is wrong by the power of his own conscience.
16. It is something that the Believer knows is wrong by his conscience and the indwelling power of The Holy Spirit.
17. It is something that should be confessed to God and to other Believers daily to deprive it of its power.
18. It is something that will only grow in power if it be professed to the wrong person or people.
19. It is the thing that makes us unequally yoked with another.
20. It is something that we must repent of (turn away from) to permanently discourage it.
21. It is something worth our efforts to atone for here on earth. (Heavenly perfect atonement has been made for the Believer by Jesus Christ.)
22. It is the thing that has the power to destroy us, to send us to Hell, and to separate us from God and from others who love God, forever.
Copyright 2023. L.L. Shelton.
Following every glittering testimony of faith from one raised in a stable Christian home- learning at an earthly father’s knee to love The Heavenly Father, happily participating in church life with the family, knowing a lifetime of Christian heritage- is a chorus of genuine amens and hearty hallelujahs! And rightly so!
But for many hearers, there’s a whispered, “please Lord, let that be my kid’s witness someday, since it will never be mine.” There are those thinking of when they were children and rode the church bus alone every Sunday- and still are the only professing Christians in their families. Many are remembering regular family participation in church- punctuated by long days and nights of familial dysfunction. Many have no memory of attending church as a child. Due to the troublesome vines continuously trying to choke it to death, some folks may not be able to distinguish the branches of their family tree.
The Good News is: If you have kissed a hundred frogs and not one of them turned into royalty, if you are sleeping with pigs and slapping off flies, if you do not know your earthly father- much less your heavenly one, if you are running hard and fast from pain- afraid to slow down and catch your breath; there’s a GOD in heaven who made you, who loves you- and if you seek Him- you’ll find He was willing to take human form and die to redeem you from your natural sinful state and your proclivity to sin.
Sin has many natural consequences. Some are merely difficult, others are horrid. Most important however, is the ultimate price of our sin: It is spiritual death and eternal separation from GOD, and from all that is good and pure. Good tidings of great joy: Jesus Christ has come to buy back his own from the dark side! GOD in The Son of God has paid in full for our offenses toward Him and for the harm we have done others!
Now, respectfully, before all you precious theologians on every side of the many fences we’ve built prepare to take me to task- I thoughtfully read the book, too. The Book says, if anyone wants GOD it is an act of His sovereign grace in that one’s life. It says, if anyone is willing to trust in and sincerely believes on Jesus Christ, The Only Begotten Son of God, for personal salvation from sin it is an act of sovereign grace. And if anyone consistently, yet imperfectly, displays the fruits of salvation and of The Indwelling of The Holy Spirit it is an act of sovereign grace. And if anyone genuinely wants GOD he or she is elect. And if anyone chooses GOD it is because GOD CHOSE first. It says, there is not one thing, NO NOT ONE, that any of us lowly humans can do to better ourselves and our position before A HOLY GOD. We can not even WANT God on our own. We cannot be WILLING to obey on our own. There is not one tiny work we can do without God either to save ourselves or to keep ourselves saved. Everything is ALL of GOD and everything is owed to Him. Justified- sanctified- glorified, ALL OF HIM! By Him, for Him, and through Him, ALL things came to be, and are coming to be, and will be, and are held together. These things are in the book. These things are in His Word.
Therefore, if you are one with a less than sparkling legacy and you truly want God, you will simply look to Him, as did the thief on the cross that solemn day long ago on Calvary’s Hill, and you will be saved! Then, you will go find your new brothers and sisters! You will link arms with them and in the power of The Holy Spirit, embrace the struggle against sin! You will go and celebrate the victory that was hard-won for you! Merry Christmas And A Shiny New Year!
Copyright 2023. L. L. Shelton.
TIME FOR A REALITY CHECK CHURCH:
WHERE ARE WE?
We are on a planet largely controlled by powerful men who consider themselves God. We in the United States, are located within western society as it continues to abandon the principles of The Christian Faith. We in America, are in a nation often governed by crooked and perverse men, and we are surrounded by a confused generation.
WHEN ARE WE?
We are in a time that bitter is called sweet, and evil is called good. We are in a period of great deception, and are initially concerned with covering our sin rather than repenting of our sin. The mad is deemed reasonable. The criminal is protected and the victim is punished. We are occupying during the upside-down, and we may truly be nearing the end of the church age.
HOW ARE WE?
Following the traumatic events of two world wars, our corporate society began the primary pursuit of personal peace and affluence. Separating ourselves from the principles found in God’s Word, we spiraled into a sexual revolution and we witnessed the demoralization and eventual break down of the family. The generation of free-love and casual sex was followed by a homosexual revolution. We are in the midst of a transgender revolution. Our traumatized society may result in a collective reprobate mind. Our earthly leaders appear to be considering a third world war.
WHO ARE WE?
We are the redeemed. We are the saved. We are bought at great price. We are Saints. We are Believers. We are the precious children of THE MOST HIGH GOD; possessions of GOD marked with His permanent seal. We are friends of Jesus Christ. We are the family of GOD. We have the mind of GOD. We are those who can not be separated from the LOVE of GOD. We are the ones who will stand.
WHY ARE WE HERE?
To be the light of the world. To be luminaries and blessings. To enjoy GOD. To be witnesses to TRUTH. To live before a watching world with eternity in our hearts. We are here to share THE GOOD NEWS to the glory of GOD! We are in Christ the HOPE of the world!
WHAT ARE WE TO DO?
This is our high calling and reasonable service. This is our mission. Our orders have not changed. We are to occupy expectantly as we await our LORD’s return.
And since GOD is with us and for us, who can be against us?
Copyright 2023. L.L. Shelton.
From tremendous tower to palatial particle accelerator, we are determined to find God through contrived methods and limited modalities. We are sure that we can discover and sing the science without being in relationship with its composer, unwilling to admit that we are only familiar with a derivative of authentic music. Science is perfectly beautiful but should be studied in relationship with God as the magnificent and extravagant language of God. Science should never be approached separately from a genuine relationship with God. Science is knowledge, literally “to know.” Knowledge apart from wisdom, divided from God, is missing an element essential to its core; something completely necessary to a proper application of knowledge.
The tree of the knowledge of good and evil, growing in paradise, was a tree of science, a tree of knowing. This tree was a tree of many branches, of numerous disciplines, all capable of overwhelming our human sensitivities and bringing us to desolate places of ruin apart from the loving leadership of our Creator. When we disobeyed GOD, made him sad, in other words-sinned- when we took and ate from this tree, we internalized the fruit, the knowing. This knowing encompassed the good and the evil and implanted in us an awareness of the difference between the two, as we were endowed with a conscience; therefore we are accountable to God for our knowing. It is our responsibility to acquire wisdom.
We must never give ourselves to the creation, for the creation- life- is absolutely vulnerable to all forms of death and dying apart from her Creator, with physical death at some point guaranteed; rather there is a way to give ourselves back to the Creator. The way home is to be reunited with GOD, to become one with our Creator; we must accept the blood sacrifice of Jesus Christ, the only begotten Son of God, as the substitutionary atonement for the sin that produced our original separation from GOD, and maintains our perpetual separation from Him. We must believe in Christ’s atonement, through His sinless life, death, burial, and resurrection, accept it and bow our knee in acknowledgment of the Lordship of Christ; GOD’s plan for our salvation from this world and our translation into the next, where we will continue to enjoy our Creator and glorify Him forever. Let the true music begin!
Copyright 2021. L.L. Shelton.
I always taught my children to remember their three things:
I taught them who Jesus was and who Jesus is. I taught them the definition of authority and that some authority is good and of GOD and that some is evil; as every good thing fell in the beginning and can now be perverted. I told them to follow authority ONLY when authority did not ask them to sin or to go against THE GOD of THE BIBLE. I taught them that though manners and customs can be very specific as pertaining to different societies, ultimately manners are a way of behaving that does not offend another, and that good manners are defined in the Golden rule. The Golden rule reminds us to do to others only that we would in our reasonable mind do or want done to ourselves.
In this present world, It is becoming increasingly difficult to know when the authority is in opposition to GOD and to HIS good. Yet, as always, we must be able to recognize sin, and sin is anything that is displeasing to GOD, and to resist sin or flee from it. I ask now that my children and all people pray for discernment- BEG for wisdom- and resist any authority in opposition to the good that is GOD.
https://patentimages.storage.googleapis.com/68/80/73/6a17a66e9ec8c5/US11107588.pdf
Copyright 2021. L.L. Shelton.
October 11, 2021
Dear Ladies and Gentlemen,
I believe our situation in America (and elsewhere) is grim. It is apparent to me that we are likely faced with a choice between evils; communism and fascism, though in the face of staggering evidence neither major party seems willing to own it. We seem to have become a nation of self-serving extremists. Though I realize there have been plots and conspiracies on every side, I know we have all played our part in bringing about this present day.
I do not believe we are a representative republic any longer, nor do I believe we are becoming a socialist-capitalist democracy. I believe we are facing an absolutely authoritative government in the not-so-distant future. Our sins have grieved the heart of God and have created a sense of corporate fear. We beg for our safety with little consideration for the freedom to do good that we are relinquishing. If I lend my support to a particular candidate or party, it is likely because that one is less apt to bring harm, rather than the one from whom I expect benefit.
There is no greater evidence of our evils as a nation than the passage by the United States congress of the bill numbered 3755 and titled, The Women’s Health Protection Act. The HR bill passed by a count of 217 to 207, and 216 of those who voted to pass the bill are members of the Democratic Party. This bill codifies Roe vs. Wade into permanent federal law and strikes down any restrictions on abortion at the state level. It dismisses the need for parental consent in the case of a minor, dismisses the need for informed consent, allows for the abortion procedure in the case of any or no reason up to the moment of the baby’s birth, and repeals The Hyde Amendment. Furthermore, HR 3755 eliminates conscience protection for medical professionals electing not to perform abortions or to refer patients to other professionals for abortions. If the Democratic majority senate passes this bill, surely we will deserve to lose autonomy over our own bodies, but I hope and pray for the unmerited mercy of God toward us. Please call your state senators at 202-224-2131 and ask them to vote against this horrific bill!
My heart breaks for America, land that I do love, and at this juncture in her history, I wish to confirm publicly my own political position for the sake of posterity and as a reference during the days of greater division and probable unification around a totalitarian regime:
I am grateful to you, the reader, for allowing me this brief liberation of conscience.
Sincerely,
L.L. Shelton
Copyright 2021. L.L. Shelton.
My Dearest Sons,
If men do not appreciate the world of today, they must look to themselves. God set up the order of things and placed men at the helm. If what has transpired, if what is, does not suit them, they have only themselves to blame. Maybe it is time to live according to God’s standards? Maybe it is time to value God and His Word above personal comfort and pleasures? Maybe it is time to bring back an individual sense of moral obligation and duty, and a denial of selfish interests?
I’m sure the decision to remain single in Jesus and for the sake of the gospel, has its own very great rewards, and there are those faithful to this decision and lifestyle who may be of aid to you, should you take this path. However, I am familiar with the sacrement of marriage. Marriage is the most beautiful illustration of sacrifice and joy because when done with pure intention; it imitates the sacrifice of God in Christ. It is a picture of our relationship to Christ, highlighting the sacrifice He made, loving us while we were unlovable, and the blessing and joy He received and receives continually in an everlasting flow as a result. Christ sits at God’s right hand enjoying Him forever! If you decide on marriage and want the best insurance that your marriage will be one that glorifies God, begin by dating only a woman who professes to love Jesus Christ, the son of God, and to own Him as her Savior and Lord.
Remember: Man brought about the fall by his abdication of duty in the garden. He chose to honor the gift rather than the giver. He turned away from his First Love, if only for a moment, and failed to lovingly lead. Then, when his Creator came looking for him to talk it over, he blamed God for the whole mess. If unhappiness, oppression, evil is abounding- return to your First Love. Acknowledge Your Creator and turn from your wickedness- and stop blaming God and others for your sin.
Stomping your foot in the backroom will not impress anyone. Yelling at others and demanding that they respect you “just because” will not work. Instilling fear in others may keep them close to you for a season but it will never do for the long haul. You must earn your place of respect in their lives, and it is their duty to respond rightly. Women and children generally and in the absence of illness, do answer well to genuinely loving, gentle guidance, and self-sacrificial leadership. And though they do not, your call to righteousness remains. When you fail, go first to God, and seek His forgiveness. Follow this with an authentic apology to the one or more whom you have wronged and there seek forgiveness. Endeavor always to approach your charges with humility, compassion, and a pure heart, clothed in the quiet strength and resolute confidence that is the result of a completely surrendered life; and you will meet with God’s idea of success.
Still, the success you achieve within your own family will not necessarily follow in the world outside your family circle and the circle of the true church. The organized church will be a place of like-minded Believers and fellows in the faith for the most part, but even here you will find some imposters. There will be some within its walls who serve darkness. The world will certainly not be without flaw. And the world will challenge all, including those who have grown up under your leadership. Only each one’s personal relationship with Christ will keep him or her safe from evil. We live within a system marred by sin and hatred for what is right and true. Humans are broken and only God in Jesus Christ can fix them.
But in the midst of all, you can find rest knowing that keeping your own eyes on Jesus, you faithfully honored and served your God, and that you led by loving example and tender heart toward those you touched, and that while imperfect, you were an example of His servant leadership to those within your sphere of influence, ever hopeful that each one would receive Jesus Christ as his or her personal Lord and Savior. It is the best that any man can do.
I love you ever and always,
Mother
Copyright 2021. L.L. Shelton.
Dennis Rader, a.k.a., BTK, was interviewed and profiled by FBI agent and original Mindhunter, John Douglas. Douglas later wrote a book, Inside the Mind of BTK: The True Story Behind the Thirty-Year Hunt for the Notorious Wichita Serial Killer, about him and the encounter. Psychologist, Dr. Katherine Ramsland, has recently written a fascinating account of Dennis Rader’s life in her book, Confession of A Serial Killer, based on several years of communication with him following his incarceration. After reading their thoughts, and those of Rader included in their writings, watching videos of Dennis Rader, including his confession, as well as reading his daughter, Kerri Rader Rawson’s hard-won bittersweet testimony, in her book, A Serial Killer’s Daughter- I believe the initial step toward evil for Dennis Rader, who would eventually devolve into BTK, a serial killer responsible for brutally murdering ten people, including men, women, and children in Wichita, Kansas over a thirty year period, was his assumption that he and other human beings are good. By Dennis Rader’s own admission, he thinks he is a “good person who did some bad things,” [1]. According to the Holy Scriptures, upon which we build our Christian Faith, this is completely untrue. We are totally depraved (intent on evil) from conception [2].
The doctrine of total depravity is obvious to any parent who has closely observed his or her youngest children. Children nearly never need be instructed to pinch, hit, bite, lie, or steal; however the “good” behavior, that behavior respecting the needs and desires of others to be treated fairly, must be diligently taught. Christ teaches us that unrighteous anger, murderous thought (hatred of another) is like murder in regard to God’s judgement of sin. A lustful thought is equated with actual adultery. [3]. The Psalmist along with The Apostle Paul, infused with The Holy Spirit of God in Christ, teaches that apart from Christ we have no good thing- least of all a truly good character [4]. As Saint Augustine confessed, “I have seen and known even a baby envious; it could not speak, yet it turned pale and looked bitterly on its foster brother: Who does not know this?” [5].
Subsequently, building on this weak foundation, Dennis Rader began a fantasy life as a young boy of ten and ignoring his conscience, continually nurturing instead his own nature to sin; he easily incorporated trauma related to his primary experience of self-gratification, low self-esteem connected to probable learning disabilities and a poorer standard of living than many, as well as being socially awkward, and angry, into his developing sexuality [6]. Dennis began the construction of an elaborate inner world of his own in which he was all-powerful and participated in the degradation of himself and others, and along with that he regularly enjoyed the pleasure of self-gratification through masturbation [7]. He continued building this alternate reality, of which he is the star and is accountable to no one, throughout his adolescence and continuing into his adult life [8]. According to Dr. Katherine Ramsfield’s documentation, he continues adding to it as he resides in a maximum security prison in Kansas serving ten consecutive life sentences. Let us remember Saint Augustine, who wrote in his confessions, “…yet I knew not that evil was but a privation of good, until at last a thing ceases altogether to be,” [9].
I would argue that Dennis Rader must be considered to be retarded in a social, emotional, and sexual sense. While he may be of normal intellectual capacity, is of a certain chronological age, and was able to function as a grown-up in a few specific areas for many years, I believe his entertainment of evil ideas, as well as obsessive preoccupation with himself and his immature sexuality; confused his development and locked him into early adolescence socially, emotionally, and sexually. Therefore, he failed to secure a healthy sense of self and of his own masculinity, and consequently felt a constant source of frustration [10]. Jesus taught that our thought-life, our imagination, must be given over to Him and to His control- for “as a man thinks, so is he,” [11]. We learn that we are what we think. We understand that we must learn to think the way Jesus thinks, according to His Word. This is a second doctrine that one must clearly understand and subscribe to, to cooperate fully in his or her sanctification- the working out of his or her faith [12].
Thirdly, Dennis Radar did not seem to possess the sound doctrine that sex was created to be practiced within the bounds of a marriage between one man and one woman, both rightly related to God. Sex was not intended for practice outside of the confines of this right relationship between two people and their God [13]. Fornication, adultery, same-sex relationships, and self-gratification are perversions of this doctrine. The sexual gratification of self is something a person does, either using himself (or herself) alone or when using another person to indulge absolutely selfish desires with purely selfish motive, and is unlawful, sinful [14]. As Thomas a’ Kempis so aptly expressed in his, Imitation of Christ, “But he who puts aside the fear of God can not long continue in good, but shall quickly fall into the snares of the devil.” [15].
Next, Rader seems to believe that consistently and continually lying- having the character of a liar- is not unacceptable when it has been constructed as protection of his private inner world and is attempting to keep his two lives from intersecting. He appears to consider himself justified in his lies, particularly as it concerns shielding his family from knowledge of his double life, and at times he simply can’t discern his lies from the truth [16]. A basic tenant of the Christian faith is honesty- honesty to the best of one’s ability to discern, regarding who one is at the core of one’s being, integrity in the presence of self, God, and others [17]. Thomas a’ Kempis prayed, “Lord, it is true as you say; he who walks before me in truth shall be safe from evil assaults, and the truth shall deliver him from the wiles and slanders of the wicked. If the truth shall make one free, one shall be free indeed, and shall not care for the vain words of men, let it be so with me; let your truth teach me; let it keep me and preserve me safe unto the end. Let it free me from all evil and inordinate affection, and I will walk before you in great freedom of heart.” [18].
Fifth, and certainly not least, though Dennis Rader professes to love his wife, daughter, son, and immediate family, he fails to comprehend the Biblical doctrine of Christian love [19]. This doctrine teaches us that love is not self-centered, but first of all God-centered in Christ. It teaches that each and every human being is our neighbor and is therefore worthy of our unselfish love, and we are commanded to give this love- and we can not accomplish our task without loving ourselves appropriately, as God Himself loves us. [19]. Dennis Rader was initially and continually abusive of his very self [20].
In conclusion, Dennis Rader, who devolved into BTK, a serial killer responsible for brutally killing ten people, including men, women, and children in Wichita, Kansas over a period of thirty years, despite being an active church member in a local Lutheran church, though vice-president of that church when carrying out at least one of the slayings, was not committed to sound doctrine [21]. Was it a failure to believe or an outright blatant rejection of what he knew to be true? Or was he never trained in the Truth? How did he acquire membership status with all its privileges, becoming vice-president of an organized church body professing Christianity, without convincing someone in leadership that he comprehended and applied sound doctrine in his personal life? Did he lie to leadership? Did he unwittingly profess to believe things that he did not really internalize or understand? Was this local church body and its leadership committed to sound doctrine?
I learned that Dennis Rader’s pastor of many years visited him in prison, though no one may speak with BTK personally, but only by means of closed circuit video. His pastor suggested to BTK that he may have been and even be demon-possessed [22]. While this is possible, it is certainly not probable as such instances are extremely rare, and require due to thorough understanding of Scriptural demon-possession, that the event contain specific elements. Also, we must remember that, according to The Holy Scripture, all who are lost (not yet saved), separate from The Holy Spirit of God and Its resurrecting power; are not possessed by God as Children of His salvation, and are therefore subject to all forms of evil, including but not limited to, literal demonic possession [23].
Finally, whatever the biological and genetic make-up of Dennis Rader, whatever the environmental stimulus of his experience, his walk down the road to perdition and his ultimate demise, was possible due to a lack of sound doctrine. Either he was taught Truth, rejected it and did not become a Believer, or he was never taught, never challenged- and did not become a Believer, and in either case it is a shame as his involvement in the local church was extensive and consistent. Someone in the body of Christ should have been aware of his lost condition, for the sake of those closest to him, including his family members and his other victims, as well as for his sake- though he did a remarkable job of behaving as a wolf while dressed in sheep’s clothing. [24].
Alas, I pray and hope many will pray with me, Lord, deliver us first from the bent toward evil within us, keep us then from the outer forces of darkness, from Satan and his minions as well as all that they stand for, and from all that is anti-Christ, in the strong name of Jesus and by the power of the Holy Spirit of God, I pray, Amen.
1. Confessions of A Serial Killer, Katherine Ramsland, PhD, p. 158
2. The Holy Bible, Psalm 51:5, Jeremiah 17:9, Mark 7:21-23, 10:18, Galations 4:8-9, Ephesians 2:3, 2 Peter 2:19, Romans 5:12-19, 7:18,
I John 1:8-10
3. Ibid., Matthew 5:21-22, 5:27-28
4. Ibid., Psalm 16:2, Romans 3:11
5. The Confessions of Saint Augustine, The First Book, My Sinfulness From Infancy
6. Confessions of A Serial Killer, Katherine Ramsland, PhD, Chapter 2, First Inklings of Trouble, and Chapter 3, Dark Explorations
7. Ibid., chapters 2&3
8. Ibid., chapters 2&3
9. Confessions of Saint Augustine, The Third Book, The Source of Evil
10. Confessions of A Serial Killer, Katherine Ramsland, PhD, Chapter 2, First Inklings of Trouble, and Chapter 3, Dark Explorations
11. The Holy Bible, Proverbs 23:7, Matthew 15:16-19, Mark 7:14-15
12. Ibid., Philippians 2:12
13. Ibid., Genesis, chapter 2
14. Ibid., Romans, chapter 1
15. Imitation of Christ, Thomas a Kempis
16. Confessions of A Serial Killer, Katherine Ramsfield, Phd, p. 139
17. The Holy Bible, Proverbs 12:22, John 3:19-21, John 4:24, Colossians 3:9, Revelation 21:8
18. The Imitation of Christ, Thomas a Kempis, Book 3, chapter 4
19. The Holy Bible, Deuteronomy 6:5, Matthew 22:37-40
20. Confessions of A Serial Killer, Katherine Ramsfield, Phd, p. 56, p. 164
21. Ibid., pp. 144-149, p.193
22. Ibid., p.219
23. The Holy Bible,
24. Confessions of A Serial Killer, Katherine Ramsfield, Phd, p. 93
Copyright 2019. L.L. Shelton.
Suspect yourself or someone else of dishonesty if there is a need to retell something again and again and again- in other words there is a genuine yet strange emphasis on the event. I refer not to the continual resurfacing of the happening and referencing of it, but to the continual need to repeat the story itself, usually to the same people as often as to someone who may have never heard it.
Of course, there are those who may repeat a scenario over and over and over in their own heads, but are able, by way of temperament or different affectation, to restrain from a consistent public retelling or reworking of the event. In this case one still should suspect and examine himself or herself for dishonesty, and if necessary seek assistance. Interestingly, it appears that those given to public display of their stories are often perseverating both publicly and in private.
Traumatic memory is often caught in a feedback loop. The need to continually, even obsessively, remember the event is rooted in the fact that it was never fully processed, and certainly not in a healthy manner. The happening remains unresolved in the person’s psyche. The dishonesty arises as, in the attempt to process the authentic structure of a circumstance, particularly a disconcerting event, the memory is altered to make it into something easier to bear. This may be intentional but sometimes takes place at the level of the subconscious. Therefore the author of the memory is not always aware of the restructuring and certainly is not fully aware of why and how the memory was changed.
I believe that the supposed need for the dishonesty occurs at the level of a person”s heart motive. I work with my clients as a person of faith and understanding, attempting to draw those motives out into the Light (Proverbs 20:5). For instance, a victim of trauma may have been harmed by someone closely related to her and will attempt to alter the memory to “see” someone else as the perpetrator, or he may “reason” that he was behaving in an inappropriate manner inviting the perpetrator to commit a crime against him. Perhaps the victim is one of secondary trauma, having observed a violent happening and failed to intervene. Occasionally, I encounter someone who has dismissed a large portion or portions of his or her life due to some type of chronic traumatic situation. These changes soften the impact of the memory for the one who has been victimized, allowing the victim to maintain some ability to function in the face of tragedy.
On the other hand, a perpetrator of violence, and it should be noted that the perpetrator has sometimes first been a victim, may attempt to rewrite a memory because he or she cannot bear to think the self is capable of the horrendous act. This can arise due to the conscience being severely wounded but not quite dead, or due to the presence of a personality disorder which suggests to the person that they may not be, and indeed in the person’s mind are not, less than perfect. However, the desired result is the same- a lessening of the severity of both the internal and the external impact of the behavior. From either the victim’s or the perpetrator’s position there is a convoluted reward for the dishonesty. The problem arises due to the twisted nature of the prize. (To avoid confusion, it should be noted here that genuine lack of empathy, as in the case of true character disturbance, has no need to reconstruct memory for the other’s sake. )
My clients are often surprised to find the genuine culprit of the nearly incomprehensible past that has lead to a painful present and a bleakly viewed future, is the person himself or herself. However, once the revelation has occurred, the path to healing, while requiring a cautious engagement due to the fact that a person’s mental composition can be fragile, is generally swift.
Nevertheless, there are some who have engaged in habits of dishonesty for so long and even willfully, they are unlikely to heal this side of heaven, and some will not reach heaven. They are those who refuse to acknowledge the possibility and certainly will not acquiesce to the probability that the author of the confusion is the self. These persons are regularly sent for professional psychological or psychiatric evaluation and are often eventually diagnosed with a personality disorder, or as character disturbed. At times, they are found to be psychopathic.
Genuine honesty is a rare strength. One of noble character, who can find? (Proverbs 31:10) The heart is deceitful above all things and desperately wicked, who can know it? (Jeremiah 17:9-10) Truth is sometimes as difficult to locate as is the perfect gem, but it is without fail, worth a great deal more. Ultimately, it is the truth that liberates us (John 8:32-38). “Heal me, LORD, and I will be healed, save me and I will be saved, for you are the one I praise,” Jeremiah 17:14.
Copyright 2018. L.L. Shelton.